Li'l Nin and the comedy closet

I spent most of today with my Nannie. We went to the Mandarin, and we talked. My Nannie likes to ask me about what I'm doing next year. She also likes to tell stories about her past and I love to listen. My Nannie has had a long and tough life. She was telling me stories about her early working days. I would like to share some.

When my Nannie was 15, she set out and told her mom that she wasn't coming home until she found a job. She ended up lying to this company about her age and future plans. She told them that she was 16 and that she wasn't planning on going back to school. It was a factory to make men's socks. My Nannie worked three machines and she had to shove something on a needle so the sock could sew or something. Anyways, she worked full time for the summer, but she did want to go back to school so she told them the truth. They were angry, but still took her back for the winter holidays because she was already trained.

How crazy. At 15 she is lying and working a dangerous job. It just makes me think about how much things have changed. Imagine trying to do this now? My Nannie is 80 by the way, so this was in the late 40's. (I did math guys).

This story is my favourite. Nannie was hired at a fancy dress shop as a sale associate. This very short woman comes in looking for a dress for her daughters wedding. Li'l Nin helps her and gives her opinion on each dress. When the woman comes out each time, Nannie tells her that the dress isn't doing anything for her. Since she is so short, they all just looked like a bunch of fabric with no where to go. The lady thanks her and says she will try someplace else. Her boss calls her into her office. (What a poor sentence. So many 'hers'.) Boss lady explains that she should have told the lady that she looked fine in the dresses to make a sale. And my Nannie says, "I'm not going to lie to people just to make a sale. Don't bother firing me because I quit." Props Li'l Nin. She worked there for one fun day.

I then asked her what made her want to go into nursing. She explained some heart filled story about when her brother was dying and he only wanted her to make him his scrambled eggs. She explained how rewarding it was and how is was a challenge to her. She explained how she still loves it to this day. (She looks after an elderly women with a program called Seniors for Seniors). She then asked me if I would ever want to go into nursing. LOLNO. I told her I have zero people skills.

I told her about my plan to come back to good ol' high school for another year to think everything over. I told her that I am unsure about what I want to do. She kept asking about if I want to do a specialized skill. I don't even know what that meant but I blurted out something along the lines of, "I want to be a writer. Like comedy. I want to write for TV or something..." and she just looks at me like, "Excuse me?" but asks, "Like an author?" and I say, "No, more like scripts..." and she's like, "That's good because you have a big imagination." Thanks Nannie.

She then left to get some dessert and think over my life choices. It's so hard to tell people that you want to go into comedy because they get so confused. Everyone in my family thinks I'm so smart and shit, but really, I'm not. I retain information and then try to make a joke about it. My mind works with movie and show references. I just want to be funny so everyone just be cool about it!

When she came back she asked me if I would ever consider going into childcare and I was just like no. And that pretty much concludes that conversation. She is happy that I am probably going to go back for the year. I don't think it's that she won't support me, I just don't think she knows why I want to do it. That's everyone's problem. They don't know anything about me but they think they do.

The comedy closet is here to stay.

Surprise party success

Yesterday was my Nannie's 80th surprise birthday party. We have been planning this bad-boy for months. I was beginning to feel like Sue:

If you don't know who Sue is then you don't watch enough SNL. Anyways, I just wanted to get this over with because I knew I was going to slip up. I will keep your secret, I will lie to your face, but I am the worst with surprises.

But she came in the room under the false pretense of going to the casino and the Littlest of Nins was blown away. There were a bunch of people there, a bunch of food, and a bunch of decorations. The best part of it all was the fact that she had no idea at all.

We had the party in a museum, so my brother and I thought we would take a little tour when things started to get dull in the party room. My brother and I have fun. As we get older I am realizing that we can be ourselves around each other and not have it be weird. I also realize how much we are a like. I am of course much funnier though.

This museum had no one in it but us. So I was going up to mannequins and saying things like, "Sir, sir, excuse me. Sir, I know you're busy but this will just take a second. Sir, please. Wow, what a jerk." And then my uncle came and got us for pictures, and there was this like fake boat with a moving background, and he was like, "Woah, it's moving!" and I was like, "I know! We went in it and it's like we left the museum!" With a lot of fake enthusiasm. He thinks I'm hilarious.

A little while later, my brother and I went to explore some more, but with my eleven year old cousin. I kept telling her all this fake information and just making up random facts, as well as going to old pictures and telling her the I knew them and naming all of them. My favourite part was when I signed the guest book, "Stephanie Jenkins, and in comments wrote: I'm from Australia! I love this place like a brother." Maybe I think I'm funnier then I actually am, but we were having fun. I went up to the same mannequin I was talking to earlier, but with my cousin and was like, "Sir, sir, you have another visitor. Sir, please talk to me."

My uncle wanted me to make a slot machine for my Nannie for a fun little joke about the casino. So, I did. And it was difficult. But it was pretty funny when we unveiled it. He gave me credit and everything, which was pretty embarrassing, but I made due. This is the slot machine:

It turned out pretty well. It's not like it was supposed to look real or anything. People laughed.

After the party, some people came back to my house. It wasn't too bad. My cousin and I hid in my room. We were soon joined by my other cousin whom I do not get along with too well, but we bonded over gossiping over our other cousin who looks like a skank. Confusing? Maybe. We were also joined by my brother and we played would you rather on my iPod. I found out a lot about people. Like for instance, how my brother would rather have 10 children than 0. That was kind of shocking.

I also find it cool how everyone just adores my room. Everyone is always saying how awesome it is. And how talented I am. I just kind of soak it all up. I love my family knowing that I am hilarious and talented. Winks.

I also want to talk about how cute my two year old cousin is because he is so cute. I picked him up, put him on my lap and was showing him my desktop because it's a picture of my cat:

And he was using the mouse and clicking things and making her 'dance' and then I gave him my little plastic lamb and we were having a dance party with them and it was so funny and so cute. I was also meowing and got him meowing and it was so cuttee!!! Babies may scare me, but toddlers are just so cute.

This has been long, but that's the recap of the party! It was pretty wonderful. I am now watching the SAG awards. I love me some award shows.

The Littlest of Nin's

My Nannie is awesome. She is 79 but doesn't look a day over 60. She is on a  fixed income but spends like nobodies business. She is a maneater but only uses her powers for good. She is a honey badger. Honey badger don't care. Honey badger doesn't give a shit.

Candid shot I took at Easter
From left to right: Joe, Lil' Nin, Uncle Mark

My Nannie picked me up today for some company while she went grocery shopping. We were pleasantly walking through the isles when we walked pasted some old man. My Nannie of course knew him, she knows everyone. They talked and talked about their friend that's in the hospital. When we went our separate ways my Nannie whispered to me, "I almost married that guy." She has numerous stories like this.

Lil' Nin has been married three times and proposed to at least 5 times (that's the number I now know anyways). The first time was when she was 16. She only said yes because she liked his car. The proposal didn't last long. The next time was to my mom, aunt and uncle's father. Whom she happily married. He sadly passed away when my mom was little though. Next she married a douche, who she divorced, but is the father of my other aunt. I'm guessing the proposal of the grocery store guy came somewhere around here. She was also married to a very nice Italian man. He was the only Grandpa I knew from that side of the family. He sadly passed away too. And then there's Joe. I guess you could call him my Nannie's boyfriend. She doesn't want to get married again though, so she won't.

When we were pulling into the grocery store, my Nannie said something like this, "Yeah lady, pass in front of me if you want to get run down." She's hilarious with her uncanny swearing and road rage.

Lil' Nin and I have fun. She buys me things and I say, "No Nannie, you don't have to get that!" and I spend time with her and let her tell me all her crazy stories about the olden days.

Yes, Lil' Nin and I have fun.