The commercials.
I can't stand late night commercials. Those fucking commercials where they get a bunch of hot, boobs falling out of their shirts, blonde, baby voiced, women to prance around pretending to look sexy on the phone so desperate men will call and pay money. To talk. To a fake lady. Those ones where it is like 'local singles' and 'easy meet-ups' make me want to die. They should have a disclaimer about whoring around, because let's face it, this is not to get to know a person.
I wonder how these things stay in business. Do any actual women call? If they do, they must be very popular. I kind of want to call one day, just to see if it's like instant phone sex with some creepy forty-year-old married man that's hiding in his garage so no one will hear him, or if it's just like, hey, what's up, I'm Jack, for legal reasons that is not my real name, meet me at this address in ten.
The whole idea of it pisses me off and the fact that they play the commercial every five seconds pisses me off more. This brings me to my next point.
The Network.
Late Night With Jimmy Fallon is aired on NBC. Since NBC is an American network, I get transferred to a Canadian network that is also airing it. I would be fine with this if it was Global or CTV or one of the other bigger, Canadian networks, but no. It's called A Network, whatever the hell that means. It is like super ghetto and I hate it. The graphics are bad. The commercials are horrible.
Another commercial that plays a lot is an ad for a wall clip that you can put your tissue box on. The ad shows how if the box is on a counter, babies can wreak havoc on it or it can fall in a toilet. Like shit man, my tissues need a better place to live! Sure, in some ways I can find this useful. But it is ugly. There are these two, metal clips that you have to nail onto your wall. The commercial shows, with abuse, how easy you can smash your box onto the clips and how it is just as easy to take the box off. But what about the hanger? No, it's there forever.
You can tell this old man was fed up with his tissue box falling in the toilet, so he bent some metal and drilled it to the wall. His daughter came over and was like, "Daddy! You is so smart man! Sell this! THE WOLD NEEDS TO KNOW!" This is probably the only ad time they could afford, on the ghetto network. It's quite sad. I hope they sell a lot. That is all their investments. That is their future. (Also, they had a bunch of different tissue brands, that they probably didn't have permission to use, maybe they will get sued.)
It is worth it though, to be able to enjoy Jimmy Fallon.
I FOUND THE COMMERCIAL!
No hate, give it some love. Like it. It had 18 views when I found it. It needs love. Maybe we can kill it with kindness.
I wrote the first comment, it says: I see this commercial like 90 times when I'm watching Late Night with Jimmy Fallon. It really brightens up my late night TV experience.. Thank you. Your product seems very useful.
They better appreciate it.
Wait, this is actually really fucking weird. It was uploaded on the 9th. So, like yesterday. And I decide to write about it today!? Ahh. I know too much!
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